Response and Rebuttal Essay
I still stand by my opinion that same sex marriage should not be legalized because of the points that I presented in my previous essay. I agree with Lupe, however, that we need to adapt to the changing of times to be able to grow as persons and as a society. There is no doubt that people have changed and that third sex has grown to exist in our communities. However, we do not need to change our beliefs in marriage just for them. We can accept their presence in the community and learn how to deal with them such that they do not feel discriminated and left out. Accepting them does not mean that people have to change traditional beliefs including marriage and family. Not legalizing same sex marriage does not mean that we choose to “live in a bubble.” It just means that we value marriage, procreation, and family much more. This is not to say that same sexes are not able to do this but it is important to note that they cannot do this the natural way the way a man and a woman can. There are things that can be changed like technology and how companies do their businesses but there are also things that do not need any changing like marriage.
Lupe was right when he (or she) indicated that marriage is a basic human right and everyone is entitled to it. However, the law did not say that people of the same sex are entitled to it as well. It will definitely not end human race but it can certainly diminish the growth of population if same sex marriages are allowed by the law. This is due to the fact that same sexes are not able to procreate and can only adopt, especially with male relationships. Females are able to give birth but need help from a sperm donor. Same sex marriage is not an end to humankind but if people will prefer to be in a same sex relationship and decide to marry each other, it will most likely affect population growth.
There is no doubt that same sex couples can provide a loving and warm home to their adopted child. Gay people and lesbians are normal people who are capable of loving and caring for others just like heterosexuals. They are also capable of having a good jobs and providing for their families. They can do the work just how heterosexuals can do their work. They are also able to provide millions of homes for orphans who have nowhere to live. However, same sex marriage may not be the best living condition for children. Aside from the fact that this is not the natural way that they can be raised, there are many other factors that can affect their growth and development. Having gay people or lesbians as parents may influence their preference when it comes to choosing the people they want to have relationships with in the future. Because they are exposed to a homosexual relationship everyday of their lives, they might want to do the same thing to themselves when they grow up as adults. It would also be hard for them to let their parents participate in school activities when moms or dads are required to attend. While females can do anything that males can do and males can do what females can, other people, especially other children might not be able to see this. They might not understand how the family works and would not accept the females doing the roles of the men and the males doing the things that are only for women. It would be hard for children to grow up because they would be prone to teasing from other classmates because their families are not of the traditional type. These children would also seek the guidance that their parents would not be able to give them. Girls who have gays as parents would like to experience bonding with women like them and would like to share their inner thoughts with women as well. Boys who have lesbians as parents would be uncomfortable sharing their thoughts with their parents, especially during their teenage years where they are more curious about the opposite sex.
I agree that marriages will work if the couples are happy and stable with each other. They can be happy when they are similar in thinking and interests. However, this does not mean that same sex couples are ahead of heterosexual couples in this area simply because they are similar in nature. Having a relationship with the same sex does not guarantee happiness. It is important that couples complement each other and make the other become a better person through the relationship. If this is not achieved, the relationship will not last. Therefore, it will not matter if the couple is heterosexual or homosexual. Similarity is only a part of a relationship. Sometimes, it is even healthier for couples to be opposites because they would learn from each other. This would also make the relationship more alive because couples who are too similar will get bored with each other in the long run.
The most questionable issue regarding same sex marriage is the sexual activities. It cannot be said that same sex couples are only in the relationship for love and companionship. Sex and lust play a big role in their relationships. They are attracted to each other physically and it is most likely that they desire and lust for each other. Therefore, the basis for their relationship is lust itself. On the contrary, heterosexuals have lust and procreation as well. They have sex not only to fulfill and satisfy their carnal needs but also to procreate. While it is a choice with whom we make love with, we should not forget that sex is intended to procreate and not only release tension.
It is also true that people should have the right to receive benefits available inside marriages. Married couples are entitled to less tax deductions, health insurance, and social security benefits due to their marriage. These can be availed of if people choose to marry the opposite sex and follow the law. If they choose to follow the law, homosexuals would not have to fight the law and demand these rights. They would be entitled to it if they enter a heterosexual marriage without any questions asked. This is not judging them or discriminating them but simply following the law, which was made for a purpose. It was not made to discriminate anyone. It was made by people who did not believe that the laws should include homosexual couples because this is not the natural way to be married in the first place. Yes, we can change the law to accommodate homosexual relationships but we choose not to simply because this is not the natural way and this was not how God made it to be. There are no provisions for gay people in the Bible. There is no chapter in the Book of Genesis to include the creation of the third sex. Yes, we can respect them and who they want to be but we cannot allow them to marry because it is unnatural.
It is important to state that homosexuals should not be that concerned about marriage and its legalization for them. If they really care for each other and love each other, no one is stopping them to live together and exist as couples. This is the modern times and more and more people are becoming open to the idea of homosexual relationships. They should be contented with the fact that they can live together without any discrimination and adopt a child if they want to. They should be satisfied with this kind of setting because in the first place, their relationships is not the natural way and many people are against it. The fact that they can be gays or lesbians out in the open without discrimination is already a positive thing and they should be happy with this kind of improvement from the society. While there are benefits to becoming married, it is more important that they have a good and stable relationship for themselves. If they are able to live together with less conflicts compared with heterosexual couples, they should be happy with this. Even if they do not enjoy the benefits of being married, at least their relationships are better and happier than those of the heterosexual couples.
Same sex relationships also increase the number of people who acquire AIDS or HIV, especially among gays. This is alarming because they are not concerned with this disease anymore. They feel that this is non-life threatening and that medicines can help them tolerate the disease. It is their fault that they are being discriminated due to sexually transmitted diseases because they involve themselves to behaviors that increase their risks of contracting the diseases. It is their choice and they should not feel bad if they are being discriminated. The rest of the public only want to be safe from the diseases. They might be ignorant but it is right that they be careful because it is their health that is on the line here. If gays and lesbians do not want to be discriminated, they should show to the public that they are responsible and mature beings. They should show that they care about other people’s well-beings as well. Engaging in risky behaviors only prove that they are only after sex and lust.
As I have mentioned before, not legalizing same sex marriages will not take away homosexual couples’ rights. Being married is only in papers and the law. What they should concentrate in is keeping their relationship alive. They should focus on building the foundation of their relationship to last them forever. It is not taking away their love to each other. It is not taking away their ability to express their love to the whole world. People can be in a marriage-like situations without being married. As long as they keep their promises to each other and be faithful and try to provide for their families, the relationship will most likely be like that of the heterosexual married couples.
The rules of marriage are not written in stone but these were made for men and women only because this is the natural way. The natural way is what is written in stone. If there is nothing wrong with same sex marriages, people would not have intended marriage only for heterosexuals. People would not be discriminating gays and lesbians. More importantly, this issue would not be facing opposition from various parts of the world by so many people. It would have been approved of the first time it was thought of. The first gay couple who planned to get married would have not met resistance. The fact that same sex marriage is being opposed to by people is enough evidence that there is something wrong with it. This is the reason why homosexuals should be contended that they are able to live with each other legally with only minimal discrimination. People have changed and adapted to their presence in society. I think that this is enough respect that the society can give them.
For the most part, we are not discriminating their sexual preference. We are concerned about their purpose in marrying. While procreation is not a determining factor for people to get married, it is one of the purposes of marriage. People marry to procreate and start a family. If homosexuals are not able to procreate then there should be no reason that they should be allowed to marry. They can love each other and have a relationship without being married. If they can prove to the public that they are able to procreate together without the help of outside sources, then this is only the time that they can be allowed to marry each other. Not being able to marry will not mean that they will not be able to “love and honor each other until death.” They can love and cherish each other and grow old together outside the marriage. Marriage is not important if two people really love each other. As long as they are together and that they are happy with each other, then they should be contented with their relationship.
There are many couples out there who prove to have long lasting relationships even if they are not married. For them, marriage only limits their relationships. It is not important for them to be married because they love and care for each other just like any other married couple do. It is more important that they are committed to each other rather than have a marriage celebration. These couples will be able to take care of their families even without the benefits of marriage.
It is also important to note that if same sex marriages will not be legalized, rates regarding divorce and separation will not be affected. If they are not married, they would not have to file for divorce. Without them filing for divorce, the divorce rates will not increase. Allowing same sex marriage will only increase the number of people who are married. This will increase the number of people who can file for divorce. Gay people will also not have to experience the process of divorce and the legal proceedings that are required because they are not legally binded to each other. If they choose to live separate lives in the future, they only need to separate and live without each other. I think that this is a more peaceful way to separate rather than have a divorce and fight for each other’s rights. Gay couple can work things out quietly without having to destroy each other and the friendship that they have.
Same sex marriage does not cause alcohol and drug abuse. However, children whose parents are gay or lesbians can resort to these vices if they are being taunted by their peers because of the nature of their parents. Let us face it. Children and teenagers can be cruel at times because they are ignorant about their surroundings. They can tease and bully other children because they do not know the real issue. If the children of same sex couples experience bullying at school, they might resort to alcohol abuse and drug use. This might even lead to depression because they have little understanding of what is happening around them. They can do little about it because what is being said by the other children are true. They cannot defend themselves and their parents. They cannot change the other children’s way of thinking because they are all too young to do this. If they feel that the situation is out of their control and that they are helpless, then they might rebel against everyone because no one understands them and they did not choose to be in that situation in the first place. Same sex marriage can therefore affect children’s growth and development and gay people and lesbians should be concerned of this. Homosexuals should be concerned of the welfare of the children that they choose to bring up and not only about their personal welfare. If they feel pressured and discriminated by society, they should think how their children is feeling and experiencing due to their situation.
Adapting to change has nothing to do with legalizing same sex marriages. People can adapt to change if the change will do something good for the society. In fact, most people welcome change because this is a sign that everyone is moving forward and improving. Same sex marriage has many loopholes that should be considered before the whole of America decides that this is to be legalized.